2nd quarter update

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This quarter has been filled with joy and loss. The joy was watching the Lord move in the Philippines during orientation to the new Cebuano app-based trauma healing program. See below for more details on that. Unfortunately, the day I returned from the Philippines, my grandmother was hospitalized. She died less than two days later. This was very unexpected as her health had considerably improved recently. I was with her when she went to be with the Lord on the morning of March 30th, reading Psalm 23. I cannot begin to tell you how hard this loss is in so many different ways, as she has been the matriarch of our family. She is the one who instilled a love of travel in me when she bravely and single-handedly took five grandchildren on various vacations when we were younger. Thankfully, we have time to work through her house, but for my mom, this adds more layers of loss as she always thought she would be doing this someday with her sisters. And both of them have died in the last five years. We know the Lord is walking with us, but nonetheless, the numbness and pain are real and compounded by the previous losses.

Unfortunately, two weeks later, my sister-in-law's mom, Ann, unexpectedly died of a heart attack. My brother, Shaun, and sister-in-law, Casandra, have been married for four years; however, our families have been connected in various ways for the past 20 years. We had just seen Ann at my grandma's funeral. And 3 weeks after that, I experienced news of another loss, Will Brown. I have known Will and his wife, Phyllis, for 24 years since we worked together at a residential treatment facility for teen girls. Phyllis was my boss and the Director of Treatment, and Will was one of the teachers. They were one of my very first partners in ministry in 2007 and have been a part of my team since, even advocating for their church to partner with me. Ministry is hard, and knowing you have faithful cheerleaders on your side is valuable. Will was one of my biggest ones through these years. In 7 weeks, I experienced 3 losses amidst other challenging circumstances that I am choosing not to share at this time. May is filled with anniversaries as well, such as 20 years since my sister died and 11 years since the break-in. It has been a really tough quarter. I am guessing you are wondering how I am doing, which leads me to share a few thoughts on what has been helpful and not helpful for me personally during this time (others may say something totally different). 

Here are a few things that have not been helpful:

1. Do not ask, "How are you?" because honestly, I do not know how to answer, and my answer varies throughout the day. This leads me to automatically say that I am fine, but the reality is that I am not right now. My heart is broken. A better question could be, "How are you feeling right now?" Or "What is the hardest part of today?"
2. Please do not send flowers. I am terrible at keeping them alive, so while they are beautiful, and I appreciate the thought and love behind them, it also feels dreadful when they die and I have to throw them out. Perhaps a windchime or candle could be an option. I do save the card, though.
3. Expecting me to reach out. I want to, but I do not have the capacity.
4. I tend to be more logical and less emotional (even the tone of this newsletter) but do not assume I do not feel deeply, especially when alone
5. Not mentioning the person or the losses I have experienced

 Here are a few things that have helped me:

1. Text messages checking on me, sharing thoughts of hope or encouragement, but also letting me know there is no need to reply
2. A hug and "I love you" without the need to say anything else
3. Staying busy but on tasks that don't require a lot of concentration
4. Cards in the mail
5. Friends driving a distance multiple times to help as we start working through the house
6. Creating a space for me to share what happened
7. Giving permission to take some time away from meetings and other responsibilities that are not as urgent

My faith in the Lord is also an anchor during this time. I wish I did a better job holding both hope and pain. I know they coexist, but I tend to swing from one to the other. Even still, I know He is with me in my pain. His love for me is unwavering and unchanging, even in the deepest pain. I trust that He will heal, help, and guide us as we start to move into the part of the journey that is called no hope, the darkest part of the journey, the part where we really need our community and friends. And I am grateful I can cry out to Him in these dark moments. 

While navigating loss, there are still some highlights for this quarter:

• Launched the Cebuano recording of the new app-based trauma healing program in the Philippines 
  • We had over 120 participants, the largest group I have facilitated 
  • We had many technological challenges, yet we also watched the Lord show up in many different ways and provide
  • This app can reach areas in Mindanao that are not as accessible to the traditional trauma healing training model
  • Groups have already started, including with the military in the area
• Continued piloting of new material to help youth who have experienced community violence (if you want to know more, reach out to me)
• Debriefing training in Dallas and a team meeting in Philadelphia
• Developing scripts for a new youth program in partnership with Compassion International and the Trauma Healing Institute (this project will continue throughout this year in different phases)

We appreciate your prayers through these difficult times. Thank you again for your support and love, 
Misty

Prayer requests:

• My mom, Debbie. She returns for her next PET Scan and oncology appointment this month and we continue to trust the Lord for her healing
• For my family, my sister-in-law and her family (the Lee family), and the Brown family, as we all navigate grieving
• Safe travels, good health, and incredible ministry opportunities for upcoming travels (Dallas and the Dominican Republic)
• For the teens I will be working with to feel heard, seen, and known in the DR
• Wisdom for ways we can effectively help our hurting youth as we look at existing trauma healing material and revisions to be made while at the same time developing new material
• For wisdom in making upcoming medical decisions

Donate Now

Would you prayerfully consider becoming a partner of Misty Bodkins in 2024? There are 2 ways you may donate to Misty at Ministry Care. You can make checks payable to “Ministry Care” and send them to:
 
Ministry Care
14934 Pacer Ct.
Carmel, IN 46032
 
Or you can also make an online donation, using Givelify, on our website at www.ministrycareinternational.org
 
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If you have any questions feel free to email us at [email protected]